The Life of a Lazy Mama

We all know parenthood is hard.  What I've also come to realize is that we make it harder on ourselves.  Rather than trying to be better than the previous version of ourselves, we worry about one-upping every other mother around.

For example: I am a lazy mama.  I know this about myself.  If I don't put real effort into it, I can become an unmoving pile of mom on the couch, only shifting enough to keep the littles going.  So I can't compare my rather small goals of: "just keeping moving", "do what you can", and "feed the children" to my much more organized and with-it counterparts.  It would drive me insane to heap guilt upon myself because I'm not scrubbing the house clean every day.  Sure, guilt can be a good motivator, but wallowing?

Wallowing helps no one.

In fact, if you're me, wallowing turns into giving into the lazy temptation to give up because "I'll never be as good as..."

I've had to recognize that just as in all other areas of life, in motherhood, too, I have my areas of strength and weakness.  Despite the fact that my natural state is above-mentioned couch puddle, I do try very hard to avoid that constant state of being.  I use that knowledge of my weaknesses to be proactive.  For example, I won't get a smartphone, not because I think they are evil or that others shouldn't have them, but because I know I would be one to struggle with burying my face in it half the day... and tempting myself with one more thing just isn't a good idea.  And while my natural state is a homebody, I work hard to be a "yes" mama when I can.  Yes, we can go play with your scooter.  Yes, we should definitely go to the library.  Yes, of course you can go on a walk with me.  I've found my own little trick to get myself going for these things.  If I tell Anni and Colette to get their shoes on... we're in it to finish, they make absolutely sure of that (and who can resist a 17 month old wriggling onto your lap for shoe help?) On the plus side of all of this, I think I am good at documenting these babies' childhoods and I think we do a good job passing our faith on. I'm going to live those strengths up without shame. It's also okay to admit we are good at things, fellow parents. 

When it comes to housekeeping, things go in cycles.  Sometimes, I do feel like I'm pretty on top of things, but I would hesitate to say that my house is ever 100% clean and organized (because bathtubs and toilets always need to be scrubbed, and there may or may not be boxes that still need to be unpacked from our move a year ago in my office...) I keep plugging, trying to ignore the fact that I don't always scrub the bathrooms on Mondays, the bedrooms on Tuesdays, etc.  I try to focus on the fact that I have learned an incredible amount since getting married on the care and keeping of a home, and can only hope I will learn doubly that in the years to come.  I want our home to be welcoming, tidy, and cozy... but I have to accept that I may not always be capable of managing all of those adjectives in every corner of the house at one time.

I suppose all I'm trying to say is: be kind to yourself. Keep fighting the good fight, but give yourself a break when you fail.

 

365 Photos in 365 Days: Week 32

 Takin' a little stroll.  I have been working hard to get my 10,000 steps in every day, and sometimes the whole family will take a short walk with me around the block before I head off on a longer walk.  Colette demands to be, "Down! Down!" so that she can be one of the big kids.

The love for accessories is strong in this one.  Hats, purses, and necklaces are all favorites.  

 A little walk to the park.  Unfortunately everything was too hot to play on, but at least we tried!

 Having Uncle David nearby again has been a blast (he's home for a little while before starting law school soon)!  The girls have taken right to him... especially since he's willing to read them books.

 While visiting my in-laws, Papa set up two treasure hunts for Anni.  Every time she found a clue, she gasped in excitement and then ran off to find the next spot.  It was so much fun... we all followed her from place to place!

This girl truly is a ray of sunshine!  What a sweetheart!

We are finally getting back into the groove of going to the library.  Our summer full of travels wasn't conducive to getting books and getting them back on time without losing them, so we gave it up for a couple of months.  I think I'll attempt to work story time in a little more often this fall, Miss Anni was so sad when we had to leave before it started!

Our Prayer Corner

Just a sweet and simple post to share our little prayer corner.  It is generally in a state of some disarray (Colette takes great pride in knocking over all of the wooden Saint dolls), but I snapped a few photos several months back when it was nicely straightened up after my father-in-law made us this beautiful Bible stand. Isn't he amazingly talented? 

Ah, here we see it a little more in it's natural state.  either way, I really enjoy having it there.  While we actually sit on the couches to pray (right next to the prayer area), I love having a spot at the girls' level where they have those tactile links to our faith. 

I have always wanted a prie dieu, but I'm not sure how that would fit in this space.  However; my darling sister has promised me some cloths in liturgical colors when we visit her next... which I think would be a fabulous addition to our little space!

365 Photos in 365 Days: Week 31

 You may notice I had to slip in two "work" photos this week, and my words will be briefer than normal... mea culpa! Sometimes long days mean I only pick up the camera when I need to.  Either way, it was a good week... rain, puppies, and friends galore!  

Yes, the gate really does lean that much... it's not a sturdy gate, poor little thing.

You can always find more of my professional work on my website at www.voborilphotography.com.

Seven Quick Takes XVIII: California Edition

Because I may otherwise not get our awesome California trip into a post, we're just going to dedicate my first Seven Quick Takes in so many months to our California adventure!

-One-

Ah, California.  While I have very little connection to it, my husband's family is completely interwined with that state, so we've been twice in the last four years.  Both of my in-laws were born, raised, and met in LA, my husband was adopted from California, and then they moved back to Cali for the first few years of his life after his Dad finished residency in Colorado.  His grandparents and several sets of aunts and uncles still live there. 

-Two-

Two years ago, we spent almost a week in California for Deda's 80th Birthday (my father-in-law's dad).  This year, we went out for Baba's 80th Birthday (my father-in-law's step-mother). 

Baba's name is actually Ilinka, and she is a tough, outspoken, serious softie-on-the-inside, Yugoslavian grandma.  It was so much fun to celebrate her life and meet her friends and hear stories. I feel that my littles are lucky that they have the chance to know so many of their great-grandparents.

Yep, there was a signature drink, because Daniel's Aunt Jan is fabulous.  The Ilinkatini was a ginger and basic martini and was the one (alcoholic) thing I got a few sips of that... so yummy!

The girls were kept busy with cousins, dogs, and the amazing taco bar.  At one point they were playing "pass the baby".

 

We rounded out the evening with some cake and dancing.  There were so many sweet moments, but I think the tears started flowing as Deda (PopPop to many of the grandkids) danced with his granddaughter, Katie.  She's leaving in a few weeks for college, after years of living just a few blocks away from her grandparents.  So, yes, lots of bittersweet tears.

 

 -Three-

Doggies.

Or, if you're 17 months old and obsessed with them, "Dah-eee!"  

Both of my girls were delighted by all of the doggies they got to interact with on this trip... especially Ollie, a very patient and sweet old dog owned by Daniel's aunt and uncle.

-Four-

Because all of my in-law's living parents live near each other in California, the weekend was filled with great-grandparent moments. 

This last one is one of my favorite moments.  My mother-in-law's mother mostly doesn't know who we are (as far as we can gather), but she recognizes sweet babies either way.  At the end of the evening, Colette was running around barefoot.  Grandma Irene got worried about her little toes getting cold, and tucked Colette's little foot into the sleeve of her jacket.  As worn as her body and mind are getting, these sweet gestures are such beautiful memories to pass onto my girls someday. 

-Five-

The beach.  So many photos to share, but I've got to get this posted, so I'll try to keep it shortish.  We were able to go twice, both times to Mother's Beach, a waveless beach (awesome for our littles) on the Marina.  The first time we went we have no swimsuits with us as it was a cloudy day and we decided to go spontaneously.  It was still lovely, the girls loved exploring!  The second day was "Mommy and Daddy get a sunburn day", with lots of swimming and sandcastles. I've always claimed I'm more of a mountain girl than a beach girl... and while that holds true (the sand gets everywhere!), I definitely enjoyed our beachy time more than any other time I've been. 

-Six-

There were so many cousins to love! Anni didn't entirely remember her cousin Bella from two years prior, but she knew she had one and that she had given her her Rapunzel doll, so their reunion was eagerly anticipated.  They played hard for the few days they had together, and there were many, many tears when they had to say good-bye.  Anni cried and told us, "But, I love her, and she loves me, we love each other!  We are each others' cousins!" A little heartbreaking, but so very sweet.  Anni was also thrilled by her older cousins that listened to her rather involved stories... I am a lucky girl to have married into such a fun family!

-Seven-

You can find more quick takes at Conversion Diary!  For your sake, I hope they are a little more accurate with their "quick" adjective than I was...